Turns Out I'm An Ambivert

Sometimes I can obsess over things... but really, who doesn't every once in a while?
Anyway, I came to the conclusion recently that I am an introvert.  I'm quiet, I avoid people sometimes and I like being alone.
Great... I just put myself in a box with a bunch of other people seem like loners.
I like people and do enjoy interacting with them, just not in certain situations. Also, interacting with people doesn't make me feel tired all the time, and in certain situations it gives me energy.
So where does that put me? Well, I found the answer.
I'm an ambivert.
I'm right in the middle of the introvert/extrovert chart. And it turns out most people are.
Sometimes I feel like being more introverted, so I will be. Sometimes I feel more extroverted, so I will be.
Walking around NCYC was fascinating. If I was a true introvert it would have been draining. It was exciting for me to have strange people come up to me and start talking. Yet at the end of the day, sitting on my bed in the hotel room watching SportsCenter was a great and welcome relief from the busy day.

So I can't claim to be an introvert youth minister anymore. I'm normal, just a little shy sometimes. And honestly, when I was in the stadium with 23,000 other people, one of my reoccurring thoughts was how awesome it would be up on that stage talking to all the youth in the building.

I'm an ambivert and I also want to be a keynote speaker at the next NCYC.

Peace all

NCYC 2013 was Awesome!

Describing what is it like to participate in a mass with 23,000 people, over 200 priests and over a dozen bishops is difficult. This was my reality though on Saturday night at the closing mass for NCYC. It took 4 entrance songs for the entire procession to make it in. The entire mass took roughly 2 hours, but it seemed to fly by.
The word "awesome" is the only word that comes to mind to describe the event. It was the largest group I have ever worshiped with, and might ever be.
The one sight that will stick with me happened as the many priests left during the closing song. I noticed at least one taking video on his smart phone and others giving random "high-fives". But, catching sight out of the corner of my eye of a priest running along the front of a section of youth with his hands outstretched, alb flowing behind him slapping hands with the youth was just cool. The joy of the youth being present there, for the priests, I'm sure was uplifting and some just couldn't contain it.
There are too many wonderful things to list or even to remember over this last week.
It was awesome and my prayer is that this event, in its entirety, was life changing for many, if not most, who attended.

Peace all, as I recover from an awesome week.

NCYC Here We Come!

Last I heard, my diocese is sending the largest group to this years National Catholic Youth Conference from west of the Mississippi River. That is pretty awesome.
I've got two young gentleman and myself going from our parish. I am exited and feel very blessed to finally go to an event of this magnitude. There will be upwards of 20,000 youth and adult leaders packed into Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis, and all of them there celebrating our Catholic faith.

I've been praying for safe travel and a willingness from all who are attending to open their hearts to God, new friends and wonderful experiences.
Please keep all of those attending in your prayers this week.

Peace all!

Single But Not All On My Own

This gentleman has some great points and some great reminders for myself, especially since I'm single...

Peace all

Oh People...

People cause me great amounts of anxiety. After a week that contained a very uncomfortable situation, how could I help but reflect on the fact that life would much less stressful if I didn't have to worry about other people!
We had a work meeting about benefits. As a 26 year old, single male, this was not a huge deal for me, but it was mandatory.  After the meeting, which we had to leave early, I lightheartedly starting talking about what we learned. My co-worker who I road with went off! It was not crazy or anything but I didn't know what to say. The 30 minute drive back to work was one of the most uncomfortable half hours of my life.
Then, when I decide to just let things be, the next morning she apologizes, and I again don't know what to say. To top it off, she starts tearing up, yet manages to hold it in, but I could see the waterworks building.
I love people. As a good Catholic gentleman I have to. Becoming a mountain man and living off the grid away from all human contact is not an option. Spreading the Gospel is what I'm supposed to do... and animals on top of a mountain in the middle of nowhere do not need to hear about Jesus.
Still, being my own boss and only being responsible only for me sounds very alluring. What a career like that looks like for me I have no idea.
Here's to uncomfortable moments!

Peace all

No More "Mr. Nice Guy"

I don't even know if people consider me a nice guy. Maybe I'm just a guy to most people. Nonetheless, after some inspirational reading this morning (check it out here), I've come to understand I don't need to be a nice guy. Actually, I don't want to be a nice guy at all.
I want to be a good guy.
This shouldn't be a revelation to me, but understandings this simple are usually a long time coming for me, for a lot of different reasons.
I've been the nice guy, always seeking the approval of others, or at least doing whatever I could to not upset people. I do care way to much about what people think of me, even when I am always telling myself I don't.
I like to think I'm not afraid of anything, but being the nice guy is the one of the most fearful ways to live. Living life being afraid of upsetting people has kept me from a great deal of life experiences. The fear of being wrong may be the greatest fear I have lived with... almost on a constant basis. My life is structured around doing things that will limit me being wrong in any decision I make. Maybe this is normal, but it's a crappy way to live.
I need to be a good guy and live a life that reflects that. In that respect, I have the greatest "good guy" ever to look up to... Jesus Christ.

Jesus wasn't a nice guy, he was a good guy, the best guy ever in all actuality.  He wasn't afraid of upsetting people, but he didn't go around calling people out. He loved with his whole heart and knew it was his goal to lead people closer to his Father.
Jesus had inner strength, even more then any man today can imagine. He had courage to always follow his Father's will. Jesus had more character in his little finger then I have in my whole person. He knew who he was and did not need the approval of anyone. He was the greatest leader of all time and never claimed to be anything he wasn't; no one has ever been more authentic. The endurance of Jesus is not even comprehensible for us humans. He was in the beginning and will be even past the end. He has been and always will be... he never stops... that is endurance.
So I need to be all of those also, in whatever way I can be. Living in fear needs to go out the window. Making mistakes shouldn't scare me. I've made plenty up to this point in my life and I'm still doing just fine. I don't have any enemies... none that I know of anyway... but maybe I need some.
I still don't know what God is calling me to in my life, but I'm sure being a good guy and not a nice guy will help in whatever God has in store for my life.
Here's to being a good guy. Watch out world, no more Mr. Nice Guy for me!

Peace all

St. Joseph, My Prayer Companion

I've never really had a Saint that I would pray to on a regular basis. A lot of people have their favorite Saints; those that they look up to and ask for their intersession. At the interview for the position of Youth Minister that I currently hold, they asked me who my favorite Saint was.  In an honest answer, I told them I did not really have one.  Teaching and assigning Saint reports for the last three years I learned a lot about the Saints, but none ever jumped out at me.
Most recently I have been, half-heatedly and very intermittently, praying for a Saint that I could have as, well, a prayer partner I guess.  A Saint to look up to, a Saint to call my friend and guide. As God tends to do, I believe I have found my friend and prayer companion.
St. Joseph, the most chase spouse of the Virgin Mary, Mother of God.
At the parish I am now at, we pray the Litany of St. Joseph every Wednesday.  I believe it was this weekly prayer that really got me seriously thinking about St. Joseph. Then, with this feeling of connection to St. Joseph on my heart, my father and I took a long road trip to Oregon to see family.  I found a Church to attend Sunday Liturgy and as my father and I sat in the Church it dawned on me that we were at St. Joseph Church. That kinda sealed it for me.
I have found prayers to St. Joseph and I do find a certain comfort in those prayers.
My concern, though I shouldn't have any concerns if I truly trust in God, is that St. Joseph is probably one of the loftiest Saints I could look to.  He trusted in God immensely.  Taking his pregnant bride without hesitation after his message in a dream from an Angel of the Lord. Even before that he is described as a just or righteous man who was going to spare Mary the cruel death of stoning, as would have been the custom of the time. He raised Jesus Christ, assuming the role of his earthly father.  Think of what he might have taught Jesus! And we can only assume that as a faithful father and husband, he died in the arms of Mary and Jesus, as I hope to do as well.

St. Joseph, pray for me and may Jesus live in my heart forever.

Peace all

Wally-World... Oh How I Dislike You

Well, I had to go to Wal-Mart today.  I generally do not like going there at all, and only will if it is the last place available. Grabbing the bare essentials I headed to the checkout line. Of course there were lines long at all the checkouts... all I could do was find a line and patiently wait.  The checker was talking about how her day wasn't going great as I unloaded my stuff. Leaving a large item in the cart we both went through the regular processes. Walking through the parking lot I suddenly realized that the checker never scanned my large item I left in the cart.  Being already out the door, I unfortunately went through the dance back and forth in my head.

It would have been easy to just keep going. Having almost talked myself into it my thoughts went to the checker who was not having the best day. Not knowing if the item could be traced back to her or not, I had to go back. It was a chance I could not take. My dislike for Wal-Mart aside, I could not do that to another human being.
I'm saddened and disappointed that I had to talk myself into doing the right thing. It's a fact though, and something I must face.  I have a lot of work to do but I know the Lord is answering my prayer to be able to love as He loves.
A hallow victory, but one I will learn from and thank God that I did the right thing in the end.
Here's to the day when my virtue is strong enough flick the devil off my shoulder or, even better, never give the devil a chance to whisper in my ear at all.

Peace all