Why Did I Have To Dream That?

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy dreams.  The ones I can remember are usually good, often interesting but sometimes there are ones that I would like to forget.

Last night I had a flurry of dreams... one after the other.  From being at my grandparents farm and running into a bear (which was kinda scary but exhilarating at the same time) to playing frisbee and even fishing; if I remember right.  But I had another dream.  One I was not expecting and one I would like to forget, or at least parts of it.

All I can recall was pulling into a parking lot next to another vehicle.  I got out and a person got out of the other car (sorry, not a real exciting dream as they sometimes come).  It was my last ex, who I have blogged about a little bit, which I regret but realize I can't do much about now.  We hugged, and what I remember most about the dream was the hug.  I know the dream was just taking me back to the feeling of the last time we did actually hug, but the feeling I felt during the dream was so amazing.  I felt truly happy and my whole being was filled with joy just from dreaming about a simple hug.  We proceeded to talk  but my memory fails me as to what exactly we talked about, except that, at the end, I know we parted ways... it didn't last... it wasn't meant to be even in my dreams.

Its a rare hour I can get through without thinking about relationships.  Personal, social and all others trickle or flood into my mind all the time.  One thing that has become clearer to me is that I need to make sure my relationship with God is at least on the right and steady up track before I can even think about a relationship with any woman.  That was a big mistake I made before, and I don't want to make it again.  

But back to the sensations I felt...it probably doesn't help that I haven't really hugged anyone in a few weeks, and as a young teacher, in a high school, with not many friends and no close family, the weeks with no hugs will just continue (especially if I want to keep my job).

Touch is an important thing... there is an unexplainable power  in the simplest of touches.  I guess when a person is as deprived as I am, this kind of dream shouldn't surprise me.  I just wish it wasn't her... I wish I was over her...

Peace

And so it's not all doom and gloom... here you go!